digital garden of reflections, hopes and fears


men's movement

"Every man has his secret sorrows, which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he's only sad" – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

"The heart of fathers must be returned to the children and the hearts of children to the fathers" – Mal 4:6

"Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage" – Brene Brown

There are a lot of men's groups, initiatives and resources with different angles on masculinity. just like there are a lot of woman groups and initiatives.

I don't particularly like a focus on 'the divine feminine' and 'the divine masculine' as it can have an idolizing (look at us being divine) and divisive (women vs men or divine vs undivine/not-conscious) aspect. Divine or beastly, we are all aspiring and fallible humans as well. One initiative I like is that of Clay Boykin.

Clay Boykin and Men's Fellowship Network

In Search of the New Compassionate Male

Mens Fellowship Network, Go Light Your World Conference March 25, 2017

MYTH SALON: Compassionate Male and Men’s Spirituality

Book: Circles of Men: A Counter-Intuitive Approach to Creating Men's Groups; Supporting Men in Finding Greater Meaning and Purpose in their Lives 2018

off-limit topics

  • women and relationships with women
  • talking politics

as it tends to polarize

Summary Circles of Men

Why we come together

The twelve secrets

within the context of connection, acceptance, environment and trust

How we come together: framework, gathering, network non-judgement and communication: facilitating, conversation, language matters how we engage, vulnerability: choice, now, intention growth and change: transformation, heart, holding space

language matters

a framework but very little structure

network vs group

choice vs indecision

intention vs commitment

gatherings vs meetings

facilitating vs leading

heart vs head

conversation vs discussion

now vs when

holding space vs fixing


At the heart of the matter


Establishing your circle

You can do this